Even though I may not love my job, I still aim to have fun everyday; because let's face it, IF I DON'T, I'MMA TAKE A MOTHERFUCKER OUT! See, no one wants the anger to come out. So what do i do? I put myself in a position to make others laugh. If I'm not saying something dripping with humorous sarcasm, then I'm pointing out and laughing at my own screw-ups (like tripping over my big ass feet or, you know, falling out of my chair).
If I split my pants because they've shrunk (by that I mean, of course, my ass has grown), I share it with those around me. Why? It's funny! (Unless I'm not wearing fun underwear, in which case, no way. Also, be glad I wear underwear with khakis.) Sadly, I do this way too often. Seriously, two pairs in less than a week....just wrong.
I have also been known to dance. Sometimes against the wall, sometimes against another person (only willing individuals...no sexual harassment on my watch) and sometimes (though not lately) on my desk. (What bitches? I've got moves! I have a dance injury for crying out loud!) Here, check out said dance injury.
Sometimes I might even split my pants while dancing for someone. Unfortunately, that's not a joke. I remember that RRRRRIIIIIIIIIIIIPPPPPPPPP well. And the expressions of those around me. Sigh.
Of course, what seems to elicit the most laughter and requests is the 'Timmy Shimmy'. Yup, it's when I shake my chest (lately my man boobs). It should only be witnessed to be appreciated. So, please enjoy the following short video that provides a quick demonstration (the victim gave her permission to post). Now go forth to your place of work and dance (or split your trousers)!
