Woody Harrelson is How Old?!?

I read a few days ago that Woody Harrelson is 48 and that fact has stayed with me in such a discomforting way. Yes, I know that he's been acting for quite some time, but it never really occurred to me that he is pushing 50. It was at that exact moment that I realized just how old I am getting. I'll fess up to being 33, but I don't like to do so. In fact, most of the time I say that I'm 25, again. (Of course, I don't look 25 unless I shave; however doing so makes my head look, in my opinion anyway, particularly round. Kinda like a big, round, Charlie Brown head).

I've noticed since learning this fact about Mr. Harrelson, that I am now taking stock of the age of entertainers and slipping into a rather unattractive WHAT THE FUCK expression when I find out how old they are now. I remember these folks from when I was a kid, so it is particularly frightening and humbling to realize that middle age is sneaking up on me without any regard to my feelings.

Another moment like this that got the look? I was watching one of the early episodes of Roseanne last night and Dan and Roseanne were preparing for their 15 year high school reunion. HOLY SHIT! That makes them my age! I don't think I look that old, do I? I have been getting called sir a lot lately. While I can appreciate the use of manners, I may have to kick the next person who dares to call me that.

Obviously I have my issues with aging. Maybe I should just suck it up and start Botox injections. I did pass a billboard where a local physician has his own "punch card" for the service. Get six injections and the seventh is free!

Maybe I'll just embrace the ever increasing number of gray hairs I'm finding an grow old with some dignity. Nah, that's no fun! Bring on the needle!!!

Don't Put Kitty's Head in Your Mouth

Yup, I actually said those words out loud recently. My 1.5 year old Border Collie, Fritz, decided that he wanted to put the cat's head in his mouth. What's funny (and rather twisted) is that she didn't seem to mind much at all. What this proves (sadly), is that I am becoming one of those people who tries to reason with his dog. I'm beginning to realize that I do this ALL OF THE TIME. For instance, when Fritz decides he doesn't want to come back in the house and pulls on his leash so he can stay outside in the cold, what do I do? I try to convince him that he should come inside and stop embarrassing me in front of the neighbors. Yes, I said it. After typing it, I realize it's a bit pathetic but whatever, just my way of trying to get through to him. A dog. One of his favorite activities is sticking his nose in the cat's bottom. Yet I try reasoning. Obviously, I have the problem.

With that said, Fritz is a great dog. Unfortunately, I think the cats have convinced him to aid in my death (or maiming at least). One of his other favorite activities is attacking me at the top of the stairs. He starts his "I'm a bad ass" bark, growls and lunges at me; which is then followed by his sliding half-way down the stairs on his stomach. If I actually make it to the top of the stairs, he usually jumps at me. Granted this might seem like playing, but is it? I'm convinced that someday I will tumble down the stairs due to his enthusiasm. The cats will rejoice at their victory and lie on top of me to muffle my screams for help. Content in their knowledge that they have corrupted man's best friend.

You should see him chase his tail...and catch it. Maybe he'll stick with that instead of falling under the cats' spell and promises of endless butt-sniffing in exchange for doing their dirty deeds.

My First Attempt at This Thing Called Blogging

Okay, so here's the deal...I'm not sure why I decided to start a blog. I'd like to think that I have something insightful or humorous to say, but I think most folks do. I mean really, there's a certain level of narcissism that comes with starting such an endeavor. Yup, I realize what I'm implying about myself. (It's not true, I promise; or hope; or, whatever).

Honestly, the thought to start one struck me as I was watching Julie & Julia recently. I'm not going to begin some great endeavor that I want to document and share with whomever is interested. I just thought perhaps it would be fun to share some of my thoughts on occasion.

I just said 'I' a lot. Maybe I am a narcissist. Well hell, I guess folks were right! (I'm kidding, I think).

With that said, we begin.....