Most of us try to exhibit a little class and decorum in our daily lives. I certainly do. I respect manners and try to retain some level of dignity (not that I'm afraid to share my embarrassment and shame with, well, the world). However, we all give in and are less classy than we would like. (I hope that most of us try to keep this in the privacy of our own homes, but who am I to judge? Oh wait, I am Judgey McJudge most of the time, so there!)
Here, I share some of my "classiest" actions:
Everybody farts. Blunt, yes, but true regardless. Most of us try to refrain from passing gas in public. I do. I would rather suffer than show everyone I'm human. (The same can be said of fashion: show over comfort.) However at home, I do enjoy a nice fart. It makes me giggle, so what of it. Lately however, my dog has become a participant in these moments. No we don't create a symphony of toots, instead, when I pass gas, he now runs to me and barks. Often times at my ass. Sometimes he brings a toy. I'm really not sure what he's trying to tell me or how to take it. Still, it makes me laugh.
At work, I floss at my desk. I could walk to the restroom, but it's so much easier to whip it out and start flossing there. I can be in the middle of a conference call and cleaning my teeth at the same time. Why? Cause I'm classy like that.
I have a tendency to record my drunken ramblings and post them on my blog. Why would I do that, you ask? Well, I am a classy motherfucker!
I swear. A lot. In person and online. Can't beat my classy!
We received some snow recently. I cleared off my car, so that the other car could be taken out of the garage. I entered my laundry room from the garage and realized that my pant legs were wet. I thought, "hey, I'm home alone, I'll just take my jeans off here". As I was doing so, I was quoting Gloria from 'Modern Family' because she makes me laugh hysterically. (CHJAAAAAAY! We have peeckles! Welcome to your nightmare! Ha Ha Ha!) Anyway, I walked into the other room just in time to hear the door open. I was caught wearing a winter coat and little else. Sadly, I had to take a picture to document the moment. What you can't see in the picture, is that I'm also wearing ankle length white socks and Adidas slides. I thought I would share this with you....because I'm so very classy.
